My preferred way to die
Having a chronic, fatal disease has been the catalyst for thinking
about death. My preferred way to die is a death that is similar to falling
asleep, whether that sleep is natural or drug induced.
First, I often realize that I am becoming sleepy. I do not, however,
know the actual moment at which I fall asleep. Analogously, I want to know that
death is near so that I say a final goodbye to those whom I love the most but feel
no desire to know the actual moment at which I die.
Second, falling asleep is a natural, non-threatening process about
which I harbor no fears. Although a tiny minority of individuals may fear
falling asleep and never awakening, I know that death is an inescapable and
natural part of life.
Third, compared to a slow lingering death in which the dying person
retains consciousness to the very end, a death similar to falling asleep seems attractive,
gentle, and almost familiar because I painlessly fall asleep every day.
Fourth, if there is life after death, then I am happy to place my
future in God's hands; if there is no life after death, then death, if like
sleep, offers a comfortable end to consciousness and being. Sleep entails time
passing while I am completely unaware of everything (unless I am aware of my
dreams), including the passage of time.
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